Schmelf told me there was a way that I could redeem myself and erase all the black marks against me for this year. I asked how many could there be? He pointed to a van parked down by the river that was filled to overflowing with black binders … all me … all bad … I pretty much was done for this Christmas and every Christmas upcoming unless. . .
. . .I accepted him as my personal goodness trainer.
He performed a secret ceremony which I can’t tell you about but it involved gingerbread, eggnog, 3 reindeer, an extra big stocking and some equipment in Santa’s basement that was damn right scary.
This was my first “task/exercise” … tending the flocks by night.
Thank heavens that Dvorin Radek of HeretiCORE made this really cool shepherd’s staff thingy that has bells that sway and jingle when you walk. A definite upgrade from the old standard Shepherd’s crook. I also found some nifty star earrings from Plurabelle Laszlo of Bliensen + MaiTai and figured the Schmelf could find some teeny batteries and we could power those suckers up in case there was no star in the east or stars or lights or I just got scared and needed my mommy.
There are wolves out there you know. They could get confused and forget they are supposed to be in the woods hunting Red Riding Hood. And what if they were colour blind? That is why I was ever so grateful for Maddox DuPont’s contribution from KMADD – with all that bling on the shirt, the sparkly eye stuff, the hair and muffs. . . . not to mention some kick ass, really pointed cowboy boots from Didi Morrisey of Pelletteria Morrisey. No way could the wolf think I was LRRH. I was more like “Tall Psychedelically Angelic Cowboy Pants.”
It is cold out there. Thank Heavens I had a scarf and ear muffs from Zzoie Zee of Zanze. They come with a cool hud to change the textures. I also had some leggings from Monica Outlander of MiaMai. Schmelf got a little testy waiting for me to decide which of the fabulous choices I was going to wear. I mean I know they were just sheep and all but still, I wanted them to know I was fashionable. I wanted them to like me. I wanted them to think I was pretty. Isn’t that what we all want? Especially at Christmas time???? ISN’T THAT what life is all about PEOPLE?????
The Schmelf was not particularly impressed with my tending abilities. Something about scattering the sheep everywhere and that it would take years to find them all. How stupid is that not one of them was named “Fluffy” and that screaming that over and over just seemed to scare the shit out of them.
Sheep run funny.
SCARF and EAR MUFFS: Zanze
[ZE] Cozy Scarf Set for POE 6
Wings just a small part of gift by Joyous Living – blog post yet to come